I could get brainwashed by the Heaven’s Gate cult just outside San Francisco. I could get given a love bite by a Chagas Disease carrying assassin bug whilst sleeping in a straw hut in Quito. I could lose all my money in Vegas, and have to go home early. I could get eaten by a shark whilst scuba-diving in Corpus Christi. I could dance a drunken rumba with a mysterious Bogotán chica, and wake up the next morning in a hotel room bathtub full of ice, with vital internal organs missing. I could get buried in an avalanche near Aconcagua. Some homies in California Angeles could take offense at the insignia on my trainers, and pop a couple of caps in my ass. A lovestruck teenager in Guatemala could get distracted by a text message from her boyfriend and not see the green man as I cross the road towards me, whilst I cross the road. I could get a fatal pulmonary oedema in the high altitude foothills of the Andes. I could get buried alive by rockfall in Honduras. I could get robbed of all my money and passport in El Salvador. I could be bitten by a mosquito in Costa Rica and catch plasmodium falciparum malaria. I could get eaten by a crocodile in the Everglades. A bus driver in Mexico City could fall asleep at the wheel and crash the bus I am on. I could have a fantastic journey and come home safely. I could get buried in the rubble of a Guadalajara earthquake. I could get beheaded by Monterrey gangsters that think I am from a rival gang. I could jump of a tall building in Dallas because England win the World Cup. I could die of a high-voltage electric shock in a poorly-wired cyber cafe in Panama City. I could get murdered by pirates off the coast of Barranquilla. I could get caught by police with a hidden package of cocaine in my rucksack, having being unwittingly set-up as a mule by some Medellin drug-runners. I could catch Dengue Fever in the tropical Amazon rainforest. I could get swept away in a flash flood in the Amazon basin. I could find the lost city of gold (El Dorado), but then get lost and not be able to find my way back out again. I could get bitten by a mosquito in La Paz, and then discover that the Malarone tablets I bought off the Internet are fake. I could drown in a tsunami in Trujillo whilst sunbathing. I could be bitten by a rabid dog in Lima.
Friday 2 April 2010
THINGS THAT COULD HAPPEN DURING MY SABBATICAL
I could get brainwashed by the Heaven’s Gate cult just outside San Francisco. I could get given a love bite by a Chagas Disease carrying assassin bug whilst sleeping in a straw hut in Quito. I could lose all my money in Vegas, and have to go home early. I could get eaten by a shark whilst scuba-diving in Corpus Christi. I could dance a drunken rumba with a mysterious Bogotán chica, and wake up the next morning in a hotel room bathtub full of ice, with vital internal organs missing. I could get buried in an avalanche near Aconcagua. Some homies in California Angeles could take offense at the insignia on my trainers, and pop a couple of caps in my ass. A lovestruck teenager in Guatemala could get distracted by a text message from her boyfriend and not see the green man as I cross the road towards me, whilst I cross the road. I could get a fatal pulmonary oedema in the high altitude foothills of the Andes. I could get buried alive by rockfall in Honduras. I could get robbed of all my money and passport in El Salvador. I could be bitten by a mosquito in Costa Rica and catch plasmodium falciparum malaria. I could get eaten by a crocodile in the Everglades. A bus driver in Mexico City could fall asleep at the wheel and crash the bus I am on. I could have a fantastic journey and come home safely. I could get buried in the rubble of a Guadalajara earthquake. I could get beheaded by Monterrey gangsters that think I am from a rival gang. I could jump of a tall building in Dallas because England win the World Cup. I could die of a high-voltage electric shock in a poorly-wired cyber cafe in Panama City. I could get murdered by pirates off the coast of Barranquilla. I could get caught by police with a hidden package of cocaine in my rucksack, having being unwittingly set-up as a mule by some Medellin drug-runners. I could catch Dengue Fever in the tropical Amazon rainforest. I could get swept away in a flash flood in the Amazon basin. I could find the lost city of gold (El Dorado), but then get lost and not be able to find my way back out again. I could get bitten by a mosquito in La Paz, and then discover that the Malarone tablets I bought off the Internet are fake. I could drown in a tsunami in Trujillo whilst sunbathing. I could be bitten by a rabid dog in Lima.